We all want love in our life! But if you're feeling like you're exhausting all your avenues and your efforts aren't being rewarded, it may be time to take a step back and re-evaluate the whole situation. This is not to say you're doing anything wrong, just in the frazzled state of OMG-I'M-NOT-MEETING-ANYONE-AND-I'M-GONNA-BE-SINGLE-FOREVER, things do tend to be overlooked!
So, first, you're going to need a piece of paper and preferred writing utensil. Oh yes, this is going to involve some work. But that's part of the process. By physically writing and putting the energy in by focusing on what you're wanting, you're also releasing what you want to manifest. I explain manifestation in this way... When you exercise your biceps with weights you're saying "I want THESE muscles to look THIS way"... Your thoughts, memories, actions and reactions also hold manifesting energy.
Day 1 - With your paper, write down what you're looking for! Really think about what you're looking for. "Someone that respects me" goes a lot further than "A Dr. who makes $500,000 a year that'll take care of me". Just think, you could end up with that doctor... but they could also work 60 hours a week. Financially they're taking care of you, but emotionally, you end up bankrupt!! Leave this paper somewhere you'll see it every day so you can be reminded what you're working towards! (P.S. Decorating it up a little so it POPS for you is even better!)
Day 2 - Take a look at your list... Now, think of any past relationships that DIDN'T meet those expectations! Don't start kicking yourself for feeling foolish if they wronged you or you gave then a "second chance" for the upteenth time. There's a lot of reasons we give excuses to things... Hope usually seems to be high on the list! People can and do change. But that doesn't mean compromising yourself in THEIR process. Release those feelings that it may have been your fault. Accept that there was a part you had played and that it wasn't your fault or theirs. Relationships take the work of both parties, it can't be up to just one to make things "right". This may be a longer process.. I see no reason for feeling past relationships that failed hold no importance in our lives. Just because there may have been a bad memory, doesn't mean it was ALL bad. The purpose here is finding that balance and common ground that a relationship really needs. Finding that in yourself and MOVING forward will bring that long needed sigh of relief!
Day 3 - This is a day for getting out!! GO DO ANYTHING! It doesn't matter if it's the grocery store, mall, park, gym, theater, library... anywhere that another human companion might be, the better!! LOL! It's very easy to write a list of things you want to do and then never do them.. If you're going to have love in your life, I doubt the top thing you'll want to be doing is watching tv on a Friday night at 8 pm! That's not to say go running around like a teenager (unless, you are one!), but surrounding yourself with those who have similar interests is one of the best ways to find a starting ground to network out. I can't tell you how many relationships I know were started because someone knew somebody they just HAD to meet!
Day 4 - It's PAMPERING DAY!! It is just amazing what a new haircut can do! Now, I'm not saying go out and get a haircut.. though if you want to, GO FOR IT!! But maybe buy yourself a new nail color or shoes if your female, shirt or cologne if your male. Enjoy a nice, long, hot shower or bath. Think of the water as the love that will "shower" or "bathe" you. Try holding this visualization for 5 minutes. Make sure you really take the time to pamper yourself and make yourself feel good. This is a practice time too for DATE NIGHT!
Day 5 - It's time to go over the list again. Take a look and see if there's anything you'd like to change or add. That is all for today!
Day 6 - Tell someone you love them! It could be your best friend, mom, aunt, cousin.. BUT, it must be an actual person and not your beloved cat, dog, etc.! LOL! The purpose here is sometimes it might have been a while since we've said it, or even heard it. I love you probably isn't said nearly enough as it should be. What emotions are you feeling when you say it or hear it?
Day 7 - Compliment a total stranger! This may be simpler to achieve by going somewhere again. Compliments make people feel good about themselves and lifts vibrational energy for everyone around! There is a cashier at one grocery store near me that has the most beautiful aquamarine colored eyes, and I make sure to tell her every time I can!!
Day 8 - Reach out a helping hand. Take a few canned goods or old clothes to a shelter. Or if you want to be involved more on a continued basis, volunteer at a hospital, or animal shelter or visit the elderly. I regularly stop at senior homes to visit with them. This started with my step-sister when I was in high school and her grandfather was in a nursing home. The people I met there became great friends of mine, even though most of them were 70 years older than me! Since then I've just always made it a point to be involved with the elderly. The stories of times long forgotten hold such a magic in them!
Day 9 - Take this time to think about what you've done so far! If you are following along daily, you should have a feeling of "connectedness", for lack of a better word! LOL! People you might not have ever come into contact with have now been introduced into your world! Your "happiness level" should be on the rise!
Day 10 - Write a fictional letter to the opposite sex and tell them why you're sorry they were dumped! This is going to bring up a LOT you might not have thought you saw in a different view. Think about what it is to be on both sides of things, from BOTH perspectives! Maybe you were the girl who just wanted to snuggle on the couch and when he said he wanted to go out you took it as he didn't want to spend quality time together.. whereas maybe he saw it that it would end up just flipping through the stations barely saying anything and he wanted to take you out for some fun and show you off to everyone because your his girl! This can get to be a lot of fun and you can really come up with some good scenarios! Of course, you will think of past relationships.. if you need to write a letter to address what was there, do it. Then burn it and release it from having the hold on you!
Day 11 - Call a friend and have a conversation about relationships! If you can, call one that is single and one that isn't. Even better if you can call both sexes too!! Find out their thoughts, are they matching yours? What's different? Not only is it going to have you thinking, but it'll get them thinking too.. which could be good or bad, depending on their situation!!
Day 12 - Appreciation. Appreciate what you have. Appreciate what you had. Appreciate what you WILL have.
Day 13 - Be understanding. People have different preferences. People have different pain tolerances. Things befall people that we can't control. We also don't react to situations in the same way. Be more willing to understand and accept that men and woman ARE different... just as EVERY person is different! Embrace your own individuality!
Day 14 - Reverseitall! I think we have all seen the silly parody pic on the internet! Take a moment, take a deep breath and close your eyes. See a big blue sky and fill it with all your worries, fear, all the negative feelings you have for yourself or others. Don't worry if it starts getting a little crowded! Hold those images there and know that you DON'T need them! Then blow them away.... this can just be mentally with seeing the wind clear them away giving you sunny skies or physically blow them away while mentally seeing it in your minds eye as well. The more "connections" you can make the more manifesting energy you put forth! Notice how much freer and lighter you feel!
Day 15 - Learn something completely new! Always wanted to learn to sew or speak Spanish? Never took trigonometry? Ok, that's probably not high on everyone's list! LOL! But you know what I mean. Give yourself the chance to do something you've pushed on to the back burner! Why wait any longer? This just gives you one more thing you might have in common with someone else!
Day 16 - Realize that the completely new task you just started yesterday might "stall out". LOL! The point is that just because something is new, doesn't mean it'll be withstanding without doing what's needed to nourish it. You can learn all you want, but unless you have an outlet for it, you'll feel the efforts are futile. You can only speak Spanish at a computer screen for so long before it gets boring! LOL!
Day 17 - Think of the last mistake you made. C'mon, you know you have one.. How did it make you feel? If the mistake impacted someone else, how do you think they felt? Hold this feeling for a moment. It probably isn't a good one unfortunately. However, that's life. We have to take the good with the bad. If we didn't have those "bad things" we'd never know how GOOD things would be. You should be aware of what makes you feel good and what makes you feel bad..
Day 18 - HATE. One of the strongest words/emotions out there... Yet it get's tossed around when a better word to use is probably frustrated!!! When you break it down, there is usually a reason behind you feeling such intensity. Let these emotions go!! They do you no good.
Day 19 - Time to look at the list again and make any additional revisions!!
Day 20 - Trust. Trust that you get what you NEED. Which might not always be what you WANT. From the time we're little we trust unconditionally and conditionally. It takes time to just trust that you'll have WHAT you NEED, WHEN you NEED it. The Universe always knows what we want.. and sometimes we get that even when we know the pain it might cause. But maybe we NEEDED to know that pain to know what we thought we WANTED, really wasn't!
Day 21 - Time. By now you've accomplished so much you probably don't even realize it! Emotionally, you've covered the spectrum. You've accomplished energy manifestations, clearing emotional blocks all in a short time! When good things are happening we hardly notice the time that passes, it's when the problems creep in that time seems to suddenly become a BIG problem. "OMG they haven't called in 3 days!" or "This report needs revised and I only have 2 days to get it done, it'll NEVER happen!" or "I always told myself I'd be married by 27 and now I'm 30!". We put so many time restraints to things, that we miss out what in the present! Let those time restraints go... what may be here now, may not always be there tomorrow. To live in the present is to truly LIVE!
Day 22 - Build your palace in the clouds. I haven't given many meditative exercises. Though this is one that serves it's purpose well! Your secret lair or palace or whatever is your place of rejuvenation. If you could have the most perfect room in your home, this would be it!! Find a comfy spot to lie down, close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Try to relax to where your breathing becomes a comfortable rhythm. "Feel" a beautiful pink glowing energy light encasing you filling you with love and peace. Find yourself standing outside of a door, notice the door and walls structure and build. See a golden light streaming out of the cracks of the door. Feel your hand on the door's handle or knob. As you pull the door open, the golden light flashes and you see the most beautiful room imaginable. Take time to "decorate" your room as you like... On one wall though there will need to be a laundry chute. Or if you are like some of my bank teller friends, you can imagine it like the outside tube chute! This is a very special item. It'll take anything you don't want!! Had a bad day? Give it to the chute! Had a fight with a friend? Release your frustrations into the chute! You don't need to hold onto those negative feelings.. allow them to go to the Universe to take them and neutralize them. Then take some time to relax in your room. In mine I have gigantic plush bean bags, an indoor hot tun and pool.. it's a lot of fun! Now, go to your room!!
Day 23 - With all that fun time in meditation.. it's time to get out there and do something again!! If you haven't found something new to try yet or you tried but it wasn't for you... try something else! Life's lessons will never stop, so even after these 30 days.. it'll still be up to you to keep trying new things.. keep making mistakes.. keep having good times and keep having bad ones!
Day 24 - Less than a week left! Tsk tsk.. there's that time thing again! So what if they've shown up now or haven't. What's next? You might just want to come try a reading with me and I'll focus directly on your situation!
Day 25 - Once again, a day for appreciation. Appreciate what you have. Appreciate what you had. Appreciate what you WILL have.
Day 26 - HOUSE PARTY!! Set something up with some friends for some fun time! Try to have a mix of friends that don't all know each other, and have them invite some of their friends. If you want to throw some extra fun into it, make it a theme party! Not only will it be fun, but theme parties when you're an adult also bring a lot of fun memories of being a kid and the environment is usually 10x more jovial! Some fun themes.. Hawaiian, Magical Creatures, Cartoon Land. Be sure to get plenty of pictures!
Day 27 - Clean up! Whether there was a party or not.. it's time for some restructuring. Take another look at your list of what you're working towards and make sure it still resonates with you. Now, if you have any other clutter that you've been putting off, get it gone!! Our direct environment has an effect on how we feel. How much better do we feel when our desk is clean and free of coffee ring stains and the pens all work?! This might take a little longer than a day if you've been putting it off, but at least this gives you a reason to get a start on it!
Day 28 - Pampering time again!! If you put that haircut off the first time around... ;) We all need to take time for ourselves and it's very easy to get caught up in everything else around us that we lose ourselves if we let it go for too long. I regularly make sure I have my "beauty time".. but then again I'm Italian and if I don't wax.. YIKES! LOL! Try to regularly set some time for yourself in a way you're feeling relaxed and pampered!
Day 29 - Review all the days again... see how your emotions correlate to each of the days now. Know that it is in the past. There were good days and there were bad days, but each day held it's own significance. Review any other past feelings that you may have felt conflicted over that have still yet to be cleansed. If you can't reason them out to find the balance... go to your room, place them in the chute, and TRUST.
Day 30 - Well I am really proud of you if you've made it through the full 30 days! By now there have been a lot of experiences. You may have been journaling about it or simply pondering over it as you went along. The point of these exercises is to live and love. Live in the present and know that the future is always just a nanosecond away! Love as much as you can every day! Now go spread some love!
Love comes in many ways. In the last 30 days there were the highs and lows of love. There were feelings associated with romantic love and feelings of love for friends and family. No matter what form, love is LOVE.
I wish you the best and if you would like me to look into your love situation, please fee free to contact me for a reading.
Here are a few books I recommend regarding love and relationships.